A Public Apology (Originally published May, 2002)
To all the erstwhile brides (now married women) I've known,
If I ever received an invitation to your wedding and did not respond by the date you indicated (or worse yet, if I did not respond at all), I am sorry. Truly sorry.
In fact, if in any way I failed to be understanding, my most sincere apologies. To me you may hava appeared insane, but now I know it wasn't you, it was the wedding. (well, except for those of you where it really was you--and I think you know who you are--but in the spirit of healing let's just agree to blame it on your wedding.) I apologize, too, if ever I rolled my eyes and silently wondered, "Can't we have a single conversation that doesn't center around her stupid wedding?"
You should know that today I sit with 30 unconfirmed potential guests and a caterer demanding final dinner counts by Friday. I have also lost my own mind, as well as any semblence of productivity. I've waged the battle to avoid having every conversation devolve into wedding talk, and I have failed most spectacularly.
Please consider me karmically slapped. Thank you.
A Soon-to-be Bride
P.S. Oh, and by the way, I don't really think your baby looks like Winston Churchill.